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“And the cares of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, and the lusts of other things entering in, choke the word, and it becometh unfruitful.” Mark 4:19
So the Lord has gotten me to a place that I finally no longer have cares of this world. In the bible, it says “And the cares of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, and the lusts of other things entering in, choke the word, and it becometh unfruitful.”
I have gotten to a place that I don’t care what I wear, what I drive, or where I live or, even eat. It took me only 45 years to get there. Growing up in the ’80s and 90’s middle class meant all the creature comforts we had.
I can’t remember ever going without anything or being in need as a child. We always had the greatest and latest of anything. We would eat out several times a week when that was unheard of. Both my parents had great paying jobs and they didn’t have any vices to waste money so life was good.
As I grew up and had a family of my own I found that I was raising my children the same way but that there was a distinct difference in the home I grew up in and the one I was raising my children in.
That difference was I suffered from an entitlement issue that parents did not have but I did and I saw that character in my children. It mattered what we drove what we wore. How much money I made and the status of my career was the focal point.
Always chasing that paper that I thought would satisfy myself and my family that it would somehow make us happy. The more money I made the less I was at home. The less I was at home the more opportunity the enemy had to try and ruin my marriage. The more distant my older children and I became that the only thing they needed from me was money.
Compromising my values and morals for a buck that I thought would make me happy. Then it all came crumbling down on me, I hit rock bottom of who I had become.
See the difference between how I grew up and how I was growing my children was Jesus. When I was a kid we always were in the house of God. Whenever I did anything it was Jesus focused because it was with our church.
As I walk closer with God I see how the cares of the world were choking me to death. I was miserable with who I was and the condition of my family.
It was in that time period that God began to change things slowly on the way I looked at things. That I was being taught to be content with where I was in all seasons.
Man, that is a hard place to get to when you tied all your self worth and success on a title and a dollar amount. I sold out to the “deceitfulness of riches, and the lusts of other things entering in” I thought I could earn enough to be happy and loved.
In the intense drive to be successful, I almost lost my family in the process.
The 16 hour days and all the training I did to stay at the top of my field for what? To only lose my soul, my family, my sanity and that is exactly what almost happened.
I was chasing the riches of this life instead of the kingdom of God. I was chasing mens approval instead of God’s approval. By doing so I was a broken women who was full of so much self hate and it poured into everything around me.
It wasn’t until I learned to forgive myself and have true repentance that God was able to elevate me into the women he created me to be. To be loving and that love started with myself.
To look at myself they way God seen me and created me to be. To have my children and husband called me blessed again. To talk with God and have conversations where he told me how much he loved me and how proud he was of me.
The more I started to spend time with God to read his word spend time in prayer was the tipping point in my life. I was full of joy and love because I knew for the first time in my life I was truly loved and wanted by God, my husband and children.
I started to spend all my time instead of working and chasing the cares of this world at the feet of Jesus. The bible says to “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”
I want to encourage anyone who is not content to where you are in life no matter how successful you are to seek the kingdom of God. That one act of obedience changes everything.
I traded the corporate climb to sitting at the feet of Jesus and doing what he asks of me and guess what? Everything else was added unto me, my yoke was lightened and burden eased.
I drive a nicer car, have more money in the bank than I ever did before without working the 16 hours a day. I look to God for all my needs and he has taken care of everything for me.
My marriage is thriving again and so are my children because God is the focus of our home just like the way I grew up. I exchanged entitlement for service and now teaching that my children.
It’s never to late to change remember God loves you and create you in his image.
This morning while spending time with the Lord the Holy Spirit whispered the word COURAGE to me. That is what has been missing the last few days in my walk.
